I'm currently taking a cultural geography class and this kind of topic came up last night when speaking about Jihad vs. McWorld, so I just wanted to get all of ur thoughts about this:
I'm a member of another mommie site called mamasource.com.
This is a post that I replied to, please tell me if you think that I went off the deep end.
Original Post:From: Jessica G
Date: Wed. May. 30, 2007
I was just wondering what people really think about interracial families? I am american but I am married to a man who is Mexican. He is a very great guy, good father and he has his own small company. I feel as though sometimes people look at me differently when they see my husband. There is nothing wrong with him he speaks perfect english and is a respectable guy. We have been a victim of racial discrimination at a restaurant but really had no way to prove it. I am looking for encouragement. Sometimes people think differently of me because of this.I am a stay at home mom who is just trying to raise good kids. I consider myself a good person and have never hurt anybody so why am i hated at times?
Jessica's followup:Thank you everybody for your kind words. I just wanted to say that this is not a main focus in our lives but something that we are faced with from time to time. I do not feel like it should go under the rug. For the most part everybody loves us, that is the people that know us for who we really are. God made everybody with imperfections, that is why some of these people are hateful for no reason..If God can forgive them so can I . I will just love everybody and not let this issue bother me,Smile and keep going(:
Another member's post to Jessica:
From: Trina H
Date: Fri. Jun. 08, 2007
Dear Jessica G.I am not really following the problem that you are going through by the way that you describe your circumstances, so I will do my best to answer you as intelligently as I can with the information that you have provided thus far. You mentioned in your request that you were an American. One could only assume that your husband is not an American or you just perhaps forgot to mention that in your story.
If your husband is a Mexican and here in the U.S. on a green card having no citizenship, under the current problem that the United States is having regarding illegal immigrants from Mexico crossing the border (recent news in the paper and on the TV) and coming into the United States, seeking shelter, jobs, government assistance, which is beyond me how they would get government assistance if they are only here on a green card, but our officials tend to bend rules and what not on occasion. This might be the cause of your concern and the reason why you are feeling the way that you do. I am not condoning it or saying its right, I am merely speaking from what I have heard in the news myself and answering your question.
I can't speak directly to the issues that you are having with regard to feeling like a victim of racial discrimination, but I will attempt to answer you on a more general level since I do not know your full story and circumstances.
There are a great number of interracial couples in America, so you are most likely not in the minority. There are not too many countries that I know of that 100% of any country's citizens agree 100% to "interracial couples and families". Keeping that in mind, you must realize that no matter where you go, where you live, where you work, etc...there is always going to be people who do not agree with who you are, who you are married to, what you do for a living, whether you have children or you don't have children, your religious beliefs or the lack thereof and the list can go on and on, but I think you get what I am saying. Basically this...you might want to focus on making your lives better than worrying so much about others. All that will do is break you down and you can't survive and accomplish the things you want to accomplish if you allow others to guide the direction of your life.
If those around you are making you feel uncomfortable because you are married to a Mexican, the only way in my mind that would make sense is that your husband is not a citizen of this country. The truth is that any person from another country who comes to the U.S., though we are called the "melting pot", and that person is not a citizen of our country, but reaps all the benefits or a great deal of the benefits of being an American, while full-blooded, born and raised in the U.S.A. citizens of our country fight for this country in wartime such as the current war with Iraq, they fight for rights that others receive who are not of this country, well that causes a great deal of tension and anger, and rightly so. We have right here in our country people who so desperately need a place to live, but live in tents, need a job but can't get it because an immigrant will work for less though the American paid to educate themselves for that job only to have it given to someone who did not and only because he or she is willing to take less pay. There are Americans in our country that are starving, but food will shipped to other countries, people all over this country who can't get health insurance, refused medical treatment and medicines they so desperately need but denied. There are so many reasons that I could mentioned, but I am sure that you understand what I am saying. If you are receiving anger and resentment from others regarding your marriage to a person from another country....the United States is made up of all kinds of nationalities from our ancestors forward to today, so we all have in our blood lines other countries passed down from one generation to another, so that alone would not be the reason why you feel like a victim.
I personally have a great number of friends who are of mixed nationalities, who come from other countries and live here in the U.S. and I have never looked at them with anything but respect. A majority of them are citizens and some are going through the process of becoming an American citizen. These people show their admiration for America, they show their pride for America and yet they were born else where. They want so much to be a working, contributing American citizen because they value the United States and they value what we stand for and our freedom. I have witnessed their journey through learning about America, to the courthouse and when they stood up proudly and raised their right hand to become an official citizen of the United States....what a wonderful and proud moment for them. They are not here to "take", they are here to "give back". I believe you when you say that you "feel hated at times", but Jessica, let me tell you honey....we are all hated for one reason or another. That is very sad to say, but it is still the truth.
I don't know if I have helped you or confused you, but I wish you the best.
Have a great day, Trina
My post to the whole thing:
From: Ritz Y
Date: Wed. Aug. 08, 2007
Jessica, this was spotlighted on the left hand column when I logged in today. Looks like you've received many replies with great advice. I am personally a Philippina woman with a black boyfriend. I haven't experienced anything like this before, and I pray that I don't ever, and that my children don't ever have to.
The reason for my reply is to respond to Trina H.
Trina you wrote: "The truth is that any person from another country who comes to the U.S., though we are called the "melting pot", and that person is not a citizen of our country, but reaps all the benefits or a great deal of the benefits of being an American, while full-blooded, born and raised in the U.S.A. citizens of our country fight for this country in wartime such as the current war with Iraq, they fight for rights that others receive who are not of this country, well that causes a great deal of tension and anger, and rightly so."
I just want to clarify something here. The military is just like other employers whose company is created/maintained/located on US soil; they can't discriminate because you're not a citizen. As long as you have your Alien Registration card that claims that you can work for ANY employer in the US, they will take you.
Now with that being said. I'm a Permanent Resident. Born in the Philippines, raised in the US. I'm 27 years old have been here since I was 2 years old. I, a NON-citizen, served in the Navy for 5 years. Yes, *I* deployed to the Mid-East, (they also need supplies in Iraq, not just on a vessel or in the US), to fight for the the rights of the US Citizens along with others who may be Permanent Residents or Illegal Aliens.
So tell me this: Even though I'm not originally from here, nor am I a citizen; why is it that the stereo-type is that Soldiers and members of the Armed Forces are automatically thought of as US Citizens, and US Citizens alone?
I've witnessed so many Naturalization Ceremonies -- where there were 100s of recipients -- per ceremony -- receiving their Naturalization status. Point being: NOT 100% of our military are US Citizens. So, people in general should be thankful of ALL military and not just those who are citizens, because us, non-citizens are out there sweating our asses off; missing our families; going days without showers, the list goes on and on; just like our compadres or as the Navy likes to call it, "Shipmates", that are US citizens.
Ok, sorry this was long. But comments like this really get to me, only because I've experienced discrimination in the not so obvious ways.
You can't walk down the street and point out, "Oh, he/she is not a citizen. But she is. And he isn't." It's just not that obvious. We don't have some kind of scarlet letter tattooed to our foreheads.
Oh and I, too, have student loan debts, close to $25,000, to educate myself. And even after getting out of the US Navy, I was denied unemployment, b/c I voluntarily got out -- end of contract -- but never the less, my choice, not my employers. Was also denied food stamps and medical insurance for my kids -- What did that do for me? Not hate this country, but hate the politics of it. I find it hard to believe that even though I'm not a citizen of this country -- all my education has been here in the US -- speak perfect English -- know 4 other languages, too -- defended that government agencies right to refuse me service -- I was denied. That was something extremely hard for me to take. Not to say that veterans should get preferential treatment -- but better treatment than I got -- at that point!
Oh, and Ms. Trina, please don't take it that I was directing any bad feeling towards you, I just got reminded of my own discrimination experience, and I started rambling. I apologize if I came off like that.
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